On my drive home, I was listening to the radio and Magic 89.9 was taking callers on the topic of “moving on”. Throughout the journey, I heard tales from one guy and two girls, and both girls were on the verge of crying. I was laughing with my assistant and just as they were about to end the segment, the lovely John Mayer song played–and the laughter immediately stopped.
The first time I really listened to this song was when I used to watch “So You Think You Can Dance” and Twitch and Kherington performed on stage. Maybe it was the song, maybe it was John Mayer, maybe it was the dance—or maybe it was all of the above. I fell in love with the song in an instant and when I heard it on the radio, I was transported back to that moment when I first watched them perform (see the video below). Suddenly I forgot about the annoying voices on the radio and their so-called heartbreaks. Mostly I stopped because the song made me realize that once upon a time, I had my heart broken too.
The song begins with a few lines that scream reality for many who endure heartbreak and pain, “When you’re dreaming with a broken heart, the waking up is the hardest part”. This, I’m sure is true for most people. “You roll out of bed and down on your knees. And for a moment you can hardly breathe”. Mornings are the hardest because it is when you open your eyes and your mind is the clearest. Sometimes this heavy feeling will come at night, when you are about to expire for the day, but often the exhaustion numbs you and the heaviness of slumber quickly gets in the way of your emotions. But mornings… mornings are the worst. The presence of a new day clamor loudly because it signifies another day you have to forcefully live. Despite the violent reluctance in your head to participate in anything, you open your eyes and you face it all again. It’s different at night when closing your eyes is the perfect escape because dreams can take you anywhere you want to go, mornings are real and the details of your heartache shine like the sun when it’s bright. “Wondering was she really here? Is she standing in my room?” Oh no–there is no escape.
So yes, mornings are often the worst. And in the dance, they paint the frustration and disarming gloom of being alone.